Tuesday, November 24, 2009

The Debate Is Over - We're All Screwed...

We might as well pack it in, boys and girls. Back on October, 19 Gordon Brown told the UN, there were only 50 days left to save the world from the ravages of global warming. If he’s right, we won’t even make it till Christmas and I doubt they'll be able to do much between now and then. So it looks to me, we're all screwed. Might as well live it up then.

You know, you global warming people might be taken more seriously if you didn't get so far out there. That and the fact that you’ve been wrong about every prediction you’ve ever made, starting way back in the 60’s with your global cooling hysteria. You said we’d all be dead by now. And the outrageous claims you made way back then were just as wrong as the one’s you’re making today.

I came across a list of a few of the things you claim global warming is responsible for and some of the one’s you claim are coming. Go grab something to drink, this might take a while.

They tell us we can say goodbye to French wines because the grapes will burn up on the vines. Thanks to killer beetles and global warming, we can say goodbye to baseball because of the ash trees, the one’s baseball bats are made of will all die off. Entire forests in British Columbia are dying, so looks like we can say goodbye to the Christmas Tree.

Evidently Rainbow Trout are all going to die, so we can forget about fly fishing too. How about those ski competitions we all like to watch. Well, they’ll be a thing of the past too once the snow stops falling in the mountains.

Maybe you’re into snorkeling. Forget it. Carbon dioxide is killing the oceans too. How about a nice tropical island vacation this year. Not going to happen, most of the islands we all know and love will be under water before we know it. Salmon and lobsters will die as will the sharks and whales, so you can forget about going out to Red Lobster to eat.

Maybe wildflowers are your thing. Better hurry up, according to your fellow crazies at least a fifth of all wildflower species will be wiped out and replaced by dominant grasses anytime now. Dandelions will take over our lawns, mosquitoes will thrive as will poison ivy along with a long list of noxious weeds.

Birds will die. Once the polar bears run out of food, they’ll resort to cannibalism. We’ll experience a huge increase of brown bear attacks on people because the bears will have to travel farther and farther to find new food sources. Emperor penguins and frogs will be gone. But then so will the Artic fox and the walrus. There’ll be no more Koala bears either. Jelly fish will move closer to shore and start attacking more people than ever before. Now we even have to worrying about giant squid attacking us.

There’ll be no more sheep, goats, deer, rabbits, or lizards. But because global warming will extend the cat-breeding season, there’ll be more stray cats to contend with. But we can say goodbye to the beloved snail.

All the glaciers will be gone and the coveted Northwest Passage will become a reality. The oceans will turn to acid. The great barrier reef will be a thing of the past and some of the world’s largest rivers will dry up. If you’ve never had the chance to see the Mississippi river, you’d better get going soon. Lakes are drying up as we speak. We’ll see a huge surge in volcanic activity. There’ll more and bigger hurricanes. We’ll have more wildfires and floods. New York City will be under 20 feet of water and we’ll return to the dust bowl days of the 20’s.

Global warming will kill millions of us. Malaria, cholera, small pox, and lyme disease will be out of control. And if the diseases don’t get us, war will. Countries will start attacking each other over the few resources left in the world. Mass starvation and famine will become the new normal in the world.

They tell us mankind's very existence is at stake. I'd say our wallets and more importantly our way of life is at stake here. They were wrong forty years ago and they're wrong today.

12 comments:

  1. Wow, I had no idea the situation was so dire. The government should just limit greenhouse gas emissions and require everyone to use those curly flourescent light bulbs. Yeah, that would fix everything.

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  2. Jason you forgot that we should all paint our rooftops white.

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  3. Oh it's much worse than anyone ever imagined, Jason.

    Just think, if Gordon Brown is right about his fifty day deadline we only have two weeks left anyway. Face it, we're all doomed.

    You know, Jason, it's the exact same thing they used to say about global cooling back when I was a kid. The same people who were screaming doom and gloom back then are still doing it today.

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  4. Oh, and we need to stop raising cows because their farts produce too much methane gas. Maybe that goes for deer too. Then we could hunt them more. But the gun being fired probably contributes too. Hell, maybe we should all just stop breathing. We're producing too much CO2 and we're screwing up the planet and killing all the animals anyway, so why don't we all just die.

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  5. That's exactly the point, young Jason.

    According to Gordon Brown, we only have until Dec. 9th anyway. Remember, the debate is over. We will now just sit in a corner and die.

    So between now and then, eat all the beef you want. Drive those big, evil SUV's and live like there's no tomorrow.

    Oh yeah, according to the climate extremists, there won't be...

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  6. It is an inconvenient truth that the earth stopped heating and has been slightly cooling since 1998. Gordon Brown and the other global warming religion faithful seem to have trouble with facts like this. Water temps change slower than air temps which is why some melting continues. There is now some recent evidence of expanding ice on the planet in response to the cooling which began in 1999. Damn Newton and other scientists are always getting in the way when fantasy meets facts.

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  7. I didn't realize you were such an extremist, Hawk.

    These people just crack me up. I love the way they're trying to simply push aside the "leaked" e-mails that offer up further proof of the lies they've been spreading for years now.

    They say the e-mails tell us nothing but are quick tp point out that the e-mails were stolen. That's where they want us to look.

    I'd say, Obama's chances of passing his beloved "Cap and Trade" scam on the American people are about the same as someone convincing me that the whole thing isn't a great big crock of shit. Thanks for stopping by...

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  8. The email scandal over the, uh, apparently fudged data on global warming was dropped by the national media like a hot potato. Where is Fox News on this? There should be a public audit of all email and related documents of the so-called scientific organization that produced the data on which the GHG scare is largely based. Science and extreme political agendas are incompatible.

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  9. Like almost every news story that doesn't compliment the left's extreme, radical agenda, the news media simply refuses to cover it. Fox has been on it, but not to the extent I'd like to see. Just finished watching Glenn Beck, he did a piece on it.

    If you want to read in depth stories on it though, go to www.drudgereport.com, they've been in the lead on this story ever since it broke.

    I know, the left-wing loons out there are doing the best they can to discredit Drudge as a bunch of right-wing hacks. Still they manage to get around 23,000,000 hits a day. That's a lot od people who are getting this message.

    Any politician in the House who voted to pass Obama's Cap and Trade scam ought to be very worried. If you're interested, you can go to www.justkickmeoutofcongress.com for a complete list of who voted for it and those who opposed it.

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  10. Hey Kevin ... Been a while since I've posted to your blog. Sally & I are in family therapy. I might even be able to update #1 and #2 on my handwritten bucket list
    www.myownfaith2.com/bucket

    Thanks for following my links too

    God Bless,

    Myron@myownfaith2.com

    PS: Did you hear? The global warming thing is all a SCAM !! UFF-da!

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  11. What's great about the fudging of the climate data is the fact that this is about the 3rd or 4th time they've been busted screwing up the numbers either intentionally or just our of plain old fashion incompetence.

    Daylight is burnin' for the far left. They better hurry....

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  12. Yes indeed, Shawnee. I can't imagine the Senate actually passing this massive, job killing, tax on the American people. At least not right now anyway.

    I believe that enough of them now know we're watching and paying attention to how they vote and most of them would really like to still have a job once the dust of the 2010 elections settles.

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